Category Archives: EEEW – kissing is gross!!!

The iBirds and the iBees, Cyber Chastity Belts

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You may or may not want to read this – either way – please don’t hold it against me – I’ll be back to regular programming tomorrow (or the next day.)  :)  Oh and before we start – I want to give shout outs to Deeleea and Frankly Scarlett.  Your friendships mean so much to me!!!  Luvs to you!!!!  Xx!~Daisy!!!!

The iBirds and the iBees, Cyber Chastity Belts

My naive inner cyber child asked my grown-up real life self, “Daisy, where do cyber-babies come from?”  And I have to be honest – I was a little stumped.  Cyber babies?  Wtheck?  And why do I have an inner cyber child?

Anyway, it has been my unfortunate experience as of late, to be the target of cyber-pressure.  Say WHAT??  Yeah.  I know.  I was shocked too.  WTHECK??

Call me naive but I had no idea how similar cyber-dating was to RL dating.  IN FACT – it’s actually worse than real life dating.   Why?  Because I added the word CYBER to the front of it.  And not only does that make it SOUND worse but it also allows for a whole new breed of douchebags.  Cyber Douchebags.  And guess what?  Cyber Douchebags are SUPER douchebags.

So right here and now – I’d just like to throw it out there that I have a Cyber Chastity Belt.  And GUESS WHAT??  I don’t lower my standards just because YOU have an iCloak of anonymity which gives you more courage to cyber hit on me.  And want to know what else?   I kind of  think you’re cybersluts!  Yep.  Cybersluts.  And cowards.  Maybe I’m wrong but I have a feeling you wouldn’t DARE speak to me that way in real life.  And if I could CYBERSLAP you, I would!!!!!

HOWEVER – with that said – I think it’s completely different when two people are getting to know each other and start cyber flirting and having a little cybersexy time.  That’s normal.  And I think it’s kind of fun to have an iCrush on someone.  In fact I DO have an iCrush on someone :)  BUT!!!!! What’s NOT normal are all the dudes from UTAH fronting to be religiously devout and “ohsoMoral and wonderful” but are REALLY cyberdirty and gross!   Oh SNAP!!!  Yeah – I did  - I went there.  I said it – and I think it’s time more people started taking a stand against cyber douchebags!!  Do you really think that morals don’t translate into the digital world?

There will be no iBirds and iBees busy making iSpring happen on THIS computer with any Cybersluts.  I have cyberstandards and iMorals!!!!    And I’m not going to have a one-night cyber-fling with you just because you think the internet is a guilt-free realm.  It shouldn’t be!!!! and I DO think your computer has a virus and I DON’T want it to infect mine.

I’ve got a super-fire-wall-cyber-chastity-belt.

And just like in REAL LIFE – in my CYBERLIFE, I can’t be PRESSURED into any cyberGROSS with you.

My stupid horoscope day 8 – guess JUST FRIENDS is best

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Now playing: Akon – Beautiful
via FoxyTunes

Want to know what I like to call a BIG SUCKS??  When I decide I’m into a dude only to decide I’m going to follow my horoscope for a month only to find out that my horoscope says we should JUST BE FRIENDS!!! Say WHHHAAAATTT???

Yeah – that’s what it said.  The EXACT words??  Beautiful Venus is quite active today in your 5th House of Love and Romance, possibly increasing your desire to spend quality time with someone you love. But there’s no need to add complex layers of attachment to a new or existing relationship, for the real gift of this transit is to bless you with the ability to live joyfully in the here and now.

Lame.  But at the same time??  True.  DANG IT!!!!

I DID spend quality time with North Sydney today.  Want to know what we talked about??  My feelings for CC+4.  Yes – go ahead and shake your fists at me – roll your eyes – whatever you must – but North Sydney kissed me the last time we hung out AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS??  He had another mini freak out and had to distance himself again in order to prevent himself from getting TOO close to me.  Whatever.  So since he was in super FRIEND zone he asked me to tell him the story about the cruise.  So I did.

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Now playing: Kid Cudi – Day ‘N’ Nite (Crookers Remix)
via FoxyTunes

And THEN when I was FINALLY BRAVE ENOUGH

I told him that I can’t kiss him anymore if it’s going to make him withdraw from me.  The fact is that I adore him – I care about our friendship and I LOVE spending time with him.  And if he can’t do a relationship right now – ok.  I’d rather be his friend with no kissing than have him be so scared of getting close.

AND THEN I ASKED HIM WHY HE’S SCARED OF GETTING CLOSE TO ME

And he couldn’t answer that one.  So what did I do??  I kissed him goodbye – a good kiss.  ;)   And now he can think about it.  But the fact of it is – my horoscope is true – I should enjoy the time I spend with him and not worry about anything more.

at least for now …

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Now playing: Hilary Duff – Reach Out (Bonus Track)
via FoxyTunes

Day 7/365  Reflections in the glass – a girl should always own a pearl necklace

7/365 Reflections - a girl should always own pearls

Reflection in the window

AAANNNDDD  Reflections in my eyes … click HERE for the original size – you can see the green grass and the blue sky in my eyes

At Sydney Uni - Walking Around

Horoscope Month Day 1 – battlefield or dancing??

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Oh get ready for this!!!

Daisy’s horoscope came true!!

- mostly. :)   And what does that mean?  Cue soap opera music please – but make it COOL music – like with a hip beat k?  Thanks!!  It means that I have a little soap opera blissness for y’allz.

INTENSE BATTLEFIELD

Keeping my NONCOMPETITIVE goal in mind today I was delighted to speak to an old friend on IM this morning.  We have often misunderstood each other – in like full blown semantic WAR – because our articulation choices are very, very VERY different – but what do you know??  Oh yeah – we figured it all out.  NO JOKE!  And I look forward to chillaxing with him soon.  :)   YAY!!!

DEEP FEELINGS OF MAGICAL INTENSITY

Have I mentioned lately how much I adore my Australian BFF?  Did I also mention that he was the leading star of the ORIGINAL Days of My Life in Bondi 2026??  Well you can imagine that our on and off again “non-platonic inclinations” lead to a very – umm – confusing relationship.  Sometimes I get a kiss on the lips as a greeting (ok I always get one) and sometimes I DON’T get a kiss goodbye??  What??  Sometimes we have plans to spend ALL DAY together – other times it’s like, “ok I’ll meet you here and drop you off after.”  Hmm … complicated.

But it’s ok because I ADORE him.  And he tolerates me (heehee) ;)

So there I was – sitting at his computer helping him fix something when he has me get up so he can sit down.

He pulls me into his lap

I’m thinking – hmm – ok – wow he’s sure making a lot of eye contact with me.  I mean – I’m like IN HIS LAP RIGHT NEXT TO HIS FACE!!!  Does he NEED to be staring at me?  NOPE.  But I like it (clear my throat) I mean EEEW GROSS HE HAS COOTIES!!!

The eye contact continues.  Hmm – wow ok we’re definitely making a LOT of eye contact.  In fact – I don’t think he’s looked at that computer screen – AT ALL.  Is he going to kiss me? But … but … didn’t he just tell me he doesn’t want complicated??  Didn’t he tell me only YESTERDAY that Captain Charisma would be a good “phone-a-friend?”

I look away.

I look back.

Hazel eyes looking deep into mine.  I adjust my position so that I can look at him directly.  I’m nervous.  Am I ready for complicated??

He takes a hand, traces it down my back and then pulls me close.  WHICH IS REALLY CLOSE BECAUSE UMM HELLO??  I was already sitting on his lap!!!  I look up at him and as his lips touch mine I’m swept off my feet as if I’m as light as a feather – and I am SO not as light as a feather – but there I am – in his arms, whisked off my seat ;) quite literally and want to know what happens next??  Complicated goes out the window.    Probably the same open window that was letting in the softest sea breeze.

The next thing I know we’re on the love sac staring at the harbour, cuddling.

YEAH CUDDLING!

This is a G rated blog  :)

We spend the rest of the day together and he kisses me goodbye.

When will I see him again?

I have no idea … but day one of the horoscope was pretty fun!!! (oh and don’t forget to head over to ScoMan’s blog and see how day one of his horoscope month ended up :)

TOMORROW

Including others in your plans is a good idea now, for it will ultimately make your day more efficient and also more fun. A close friend or partner could be holding an important key to your future, and if you don’t involve anyone else, you’ll never know what might have been possible. Don’t let an old fear of failure sabotage your current dreams by discouraging you before you even start.

SAWEET!!!  Tomorrow I am making PLANS!!!  Wahoo!!!  :)

OH AND I ALMOST FORGOT!!!  As inspired by AussieErin I’m starting my very own 365 Day Project :)   Here’s day one – I only get to submit one – I chose the bottom one.  :)

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Dancing on the soccer field – I confess to CC+4

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I know what you’re probably thinking … you’re probably thinking I have some sort of ill wish on my heart because I keep hanging out with CC+4.  Why would I do that???  The more time we spend together the more we get to know each other – the more we get to know each other the more we like each other – and the more we like each other the more fun we have.  I can’t resist – and even though I know the more fun we have the more sucky the goodbye will be again when I leave him a second time on Monday -

I can’t resist.

-3 was a total douchebag for so many more reasons than I ever was willing to blog about – but he was right about one thing.  I wasn’t into it 100%.

I couldn’t be.  Here’s another pic from that boating day …

CC+4 and Daisy

I’ve said all along I needed resolution with CC+4 before I’d ever be able to give my heart fully to anyone else – and coming back to Utah – realizing that CC+4 is the ONLY person who can tempt me away from my reclusive family life – and yeah – I don’t know where I’m going with this – but you know that feeling when you’re in a crowded room, or stadium, or party but you feel completely secure, almost oblivious to the chaos around?

The world kind of disappears when I’m with CC+4 -

I’m THAT into him.

Last night he asked me out on a proper date.  He invites me to do things ALL OF THE TIME but generally I have other plans and yeah – anyway – it was Pioneer Day yesterday so we went to a Major League Soccer Game – he was fun and flirtatious – looked fly as always – and we were with a big group and he made sure that everyone knew he was taken for the night.  lol.  After the game we went onto the field to watch the fireworks – he held me close and we sat away from our group.

AAANNNDDD then AFTER the fireworks -

the stadium lights turned on

and there in the middle of the soccer field …

he grabbed me and we danced.

Yes – we danced.

He spun me around, held me close, danced me in circles and put #3′s elevator dancing to complete shame. lol.  I’m teasing – but let’s compare.  A quick dance in an elevator – a long dance in front of tons of people on the field of a major league soccer field? I guess it’s not just Australians who know how to romance a girl.

And as a quick fyi – my FM should be proud – we salsa-ed.  :)

After the fireworks we went back to his house for a party and then snuck away.

And that’s when I did it!!!  Oh wow – this was a big one.

I’m new at this heart-to-heart define-the-relationship stuff so I didn’t go THAT far but here’s how it went …

Me – “You  make my life complicated.”

Him – “What??  I make your life complicated?” He chuckles.

Me – “Yeah – you know how you kinda had a GF when I first got back?” – he nods – “Well I kind of had a BF too.” – SHOCK on his face.  I continue – “He was really nice.  We had fun – he told me he loved me about a week ago – we talked about having kids – blah blah blah – and then he dumped me a couple of days later.”

Him – laughs in surprise – “He told you all of that and then broke up with you?”

Me – “Yep.  He said I wasn’t into it 100% and he was right.”  I give him a long sultry look ;) and then look away a little shyly.  I continue – “It’s hard to be 100% into someone when you’re in Utah and into someone else.” pause –

We lock eyes for like what feels like forever and

then he kisses me.

I don’t even think I’ll see him again before I leave – tonight he’s out of town – tomorrow is my family farewell dinner and tomorrow he’s headed into the mountains for his best friend’s bday party – I was invited – but family first …

I leave Monday …

Now what??  Will he get scared off?  Will we continue our long distance friendship?  Will I see him again?  Only time will tell … but my fingers are crossed…

And this is not related but I la-la-la-LOVE this pic – my niece and my sister-in-law (her mom.)  She’s so funny – AND she’s met CC+4 and she not only likes him but asks me when she’ll see him again.  Big bonus points for CC+4 – he’s GREAT with kids.

BRECKY VERSION BLACK AND WHITE WITH GREEN

Textual Misunderstandings – A Cryptic Post (heehee)

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Somebody (I won’t say who but his code name is a #) said he pashed on the roof of one of Sydney’s ICONs (the one where people bellow like LAAAAAAAA or LALALALALALA  in Italian and French and sometimes even English.) Catch my drift?  YEP! Can we spell risky? (yay! I did! – spell it that is.)  Dancing in elevators and pashing on icons gives this man a little bit of “Mmm I like your style.”  Intriguing isn’t he?

Well for you Sydney siders (or those who aren’t) here is a link to LUMINOUS, a little thinga-ma-gig they’re doing where they make the Opera house different colors.  TADA! (I grabbed a pic of it for you who are too lazy to check it out. ;))

01

I suggested to SOMEBODY that we check it out and he was all like, “That could be a bit dangerous” and I was like, “Who said anything about a repeat performance?” AND THEN WE HAD A TEXTUAL MISUNDERSTANDING!!!

Oh boy.  [shake head]

You all know what I meant by that right?  No?  Was that cryptic?  Was it written in American?  Because I really tried to write it in NOT-regionally-dependent-English. AGH!

Here’s WHAT HE READ, “I’m not pashing with you again and I was performing/faking enjoying pashing last time.” wait a minute.  Umm … ???  But didn’t I just say … wait WHHAAATTT???

Oh boy. [shake head and deep breath – hold it – keep holding – exhale)

And they say girls are hypersensitive and read too much into things?? Geez!  He sent a text saying, “You were performing?”

WHHHAAAATTTT??????   So I sent a follow-up “No no. not at all! I meant u rumblin’ on the roof.”

OMGOSH! wowsers.  The Texts of My Life.  Sa-sa-sa-sa-soooooooo much fun.  Or not.

Oh and then today N. Syd (who I talk to like EVERY SINGLE DAY) was like, “K so I’ll see you soon.” And then I was like, “Yeah except actually we don’t have anything planned – so when will that be?” and he was like, “I don’t know because I suggested a night but you already have plans with #3.”  Umm …. WHHHAAAATTTT????  oh.my.gosh.  Well if he wants to be all WHATEVER about it let me just remind the world that I SUGGESTED AN ALTERNATIVE NIGHT TO PLAY w/N. Syd and he said HE WAS FREE THAT NIGHT but refused to “pencil me in” because I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHY.  But for.real. heaven forbid I already have plans on the ORIGINAL night he wanted to play.  Grrr.  8o| jealousy? I don’t THINK so … but come on now – what’s up with that?  (that emoticon makes me laugh btw – that’s why I use it.)

Ok – here’s the gossip from the weekend

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Want to know what had my mom LOLing for AGES last night at around 1:10 am my time (which was around 9:10am her time the day prior)??  This little juicy gossip for you.  Woot!  Woot!  But FIRST let’s dish the scoop from the weekend.

Friday night I played with North Sydney.  North Sydney who?  Here he is in 141 characters or less:

He’s hot, funny, hypersensitive, self-absorbed, ambitious, has conflicted feelings 4 me & says we’re “friends with non-platonic inclinations”

So it was great fun to see him if you consider the fact that he “shares” with me all of the time how he’s let me into his life so much more than other people – and I “get” him and can “diffuse” him and BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH – oh and he finds me attractive and enjoys kissing me (eew gross!) but we’re just FRIENDS.  Which is fine with me – really truly – but I don’t think FRIENDS should kiss.  SOOOooooo I think I’m going to have to put the X on the non-platonic inclinations.  We can be besties/BFFs and that will be FUN – YAY!  but no kissing.

Saturday night I played with North Sydney again.  North Sydney who?  JUST TEASING!  Same as above.  We went and saw Star Trek and I had to take a COAT into the theater with me because it gets THAT cold in there.  EVERY TIME.  Yeah I’m serious – I pack a coat every time I go to the movies.  And NO you sly little devils out there – cuddling is NOT an option to keep warm because 1 – we’re JUST FRIENDS and 2 – the stupid theaters don’t have those adjustable arm rests.  :)

Next up! Sunday.  After dinner with N. Syd on Saturday and his suggesting that I should give #3 a chance – #3 who? oh boy – here we go again.  #3 in 141 characters or less:

He’s hot, funny, super duper intelligent, way too motivated, incredibly energetic, older, spontaneous, and very intriguing – but a big drinker

YES N. Sydney DID suggest I should give #3 a chance – even though we (N. Syd and I) totally pashed the day prior. (pash = make out) Umm … right. ok so NO MORE NON-PLATONIC INCLINATIONS.  Grrrrr.  8o| (that was JUST FOR YOU MOM! oxox)

ANYWHO after work on Sunday I caught up with My Flattie (she’s so cute! and her BF is my Agony Uncle – SO CUTE!) and Uncle Agony suggested I send a text to #3 – yada yada yada – I ended up catching up with #3 for dinner HOWEVER because I had HOMEWORK I only agreed to meet him because he said he’d like to help me with my essay.

YES I WAS SKEPTICAL TOO!!!  Like WHAT?  Seriously – he wants to help me with my homework??  Right – and I went and saw Witch Mountain only because it looked realistic – it wasn’t because THE ROCK who is oh so hunky and fine now that he’s lean and trim was in it – no no no.  Uh huh – yeah right.  So why did I agree?  Because he made a convincing argument and happens to have firsthand knowledge in my area of study.

Dinner ended up not being dinner – apparently #3 had already eaten – WHAT?? But that’s ok because I got served piping hot chips (french fries) by the absolute most SMOKIN’ Canadian fire brigade dude.  When we left Mr. May (fire brigade) made sure to give me a personal invitation to come in ANYTIME and #3 commented that he was surprised Mr. May didn’t find a way to slip me his number.  (big sigh – he was so dreamy.)

Then #3 was like, “Come back to my place and we’ll actually WRITE your essay” and he was so super duper enthusiastic about it and I was like, “Umm it’s 9:30 pm – Yeah right x 100″ and he was like, “No for real” and I was like, “Not a chance under the moon” and he was like, “I swear.” and this is the Daisy abbreviated version of the conversation – I don’t think #3 has ever used the words “no for real” in his life.  ANYWAY – I took his solemn oath that we’d write THREE PAGES of my essay if I went back to his house.  STOP LAUGHING!!!

No seriously.  STOP LAUGHING.  And yes – this is why my mom laughed too.  Why?  Because I DID go back to his house and we DID work on my essay.  YES.  That’s right.  We worked on my essay. And then I went home.  Yep!!  HE WAS SO MUCH HELP!!!  He gave me a killer dramatic opening for the paper as well as a bangin’ closing line.  AND if that doesn’t score him triple quadruple double brownie points – I don’t know what would.

I’d say if this were Super Mario he scored a 1up – and it makes Mr. May look like Mr. Maybe Can’t Compete with #3.

First Day on the job xTWO – a business ~date~? Strike canceled and DOSE DEUX of D’sD’s500lbPQ

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First up – EIGHT HOURS of mind-numbing training for a purportedly sophisticated and elite company whose trainers may know less about their products than I do.  yeah.  And don’t get me started on my fellow trainees who lack very basic skills …

Next up – a little side work for a ~friend~? And NO – not like THAT.  It was just some simple admin stuff.  And then he took me to dinner and we talked for hours and then he took me home (and NO – not like THAT) and then he gave me a lingering kiss which I don’t want to read into … but also wouldn’t mind reading into.  But probably shouldn’t – it’s complicated.

Got home and had this email waiting – don’t mind that my ENGLISH uni teacher SPELLED CANCELED WRONG!!! Dude for real?  She’s an ENGLISH TEACHER!!!!  Ever heard of SPELL CHECK??

Dear All,

Please note that the strike planned for next Tuesday has been cancelled.  This means that classes will be on as usual next Tuesday.

I apologise for the inconvenience.

Best wishes and see you all next week.

Umm – wow.  Alrighty then.

Dose Duex of Daisy’s Dad’s 500lb Pumpkin Quest

Day 4 -  “Oh happy day.  I saw a root starting to come out of a seed.  A little more probing and I found 3 more seeds that had germinated.”

Day 5 – “Okay, I couldn’t wait.  I transplanted one or two plants into their new home, a 1″ x 2″ pony pack (4 compartments per container.)   Prodding of the soil tells me that many of the seeds have germinated.  (What have I done?  How will I find home for all of these sleeping giants?) ~No kidding dad!  You planted ONE HUNDRED!!~ The first leaves are just starting to emerge from within the seed’s outer shell.  It’s amazing how fast they are growing.  Within a couple of days they will be ten times the size of the seed they once were.  What will tomorrow bring?”

OMGOSH – what WILL tomorrow bring?  If this keeps up I won’t be surprised if we hear next that my dad’s pumpkins have turned his house into the little shop of horrors and I’m going to have to fly home with an ax and save my parents from man-eating jack-o-lanterns.  What you don’t think I’m tough enough to wield an ax to man-eating jack-o-lanterns?  Think again doubty-pants.  It’s called ADRENALINE.  And I’m pretty sure I’d have a bit of it.  ;)

Nighty night! xoxo~Daisy

Umm – Whaaat? Eew kissing is gross!

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HAHA!  Today I was so like “I’ll show him!” and then at the end of the night it was like, “D@@@@@mn – he showed me!”

Look the guy blew my mind with his wit and sarcasm the first night I met him and that same night after hours of conversation he ended the night with a peck – and only a peck – on my lips and walked away.  I was surprised yet happy about it – though BEWILDERED because the dumbdumb guy didn’t ask for my digits.  What?  Yeah he didn’t.

Well time went on and I ran into him again.  He confessed his dumbdumbness regret about the digits and then whisked me off my feet.  Pretty literally.  AANND he took no time at all to turn the peck from the time before into a little badaboom vroom vroom and we totally pashed.  [wait - no reprimands yet please.]

THEN we saw each other a few times and he pulled a DTR on me.  WHAT?  A DTR is a “Define the Relationship” talk where you decide if the badaboom really has enough vroom vroom to go anywhere. I was FURIOUS.  I had prevented and managed to escape any and all forms of DTRs for the past 2 years.  And then what – I go on like 2 or 3 dates with this dude and he’s asking me where it’s going?  Umm – No thank you please.  Go away.

So I told him I didn’t see it going anywhere and he was like, “That’s good because I was worried you may be looking for something and I really want to take this slow” and then he slowly faded from my daily life.  Hmm … surprise surprise right?  Who wouldn’t slowly disappear after what I said?  (let’s NOT mention how I also pushed away CC-450 by telling him I was dating tons of people right now even though I WAS dating significantly less because I really really liked CC-450 even though he APPARENTLY didn’t like me and ok? thanks! xo)

I’ve got issues!  I know!

So blah blah blah – I met up with this “wow” when I got back from holiday and he was so NOT wow.  In fact he was a total DB.  To the EXTREME.  And then FM forbade me from seeing him again.  Until finally TODAY I decided it’s been long enough and I could see him again.  :) But I strictly or not so strictly decided I was going to just be his FRIEND - a NO KISSING friend (we were always JUST friends anyway – whatever.)

Well I was doing well when I saw him.  He went in for the customary kiss on the cheek greeting but wait – hold up – he wasn’t going for my cheek – umm … what do I do?  umm … pause – awkwardness – dart left, dart right – darn darn – why did he just move when I went for his cheek?

UGH!  Look I TRIED to go for his cheek.  I did.  I promise.  But he was NOT going to let that happen.  So I got a smooch.  Which is WHATEVER because I KNOW he does that with his other friends – wait what?  Yeah – he’s like a kiss slut and NO that doesn’t mean he and I are destined to be together.

So then we had a lovely dinner.  We had a lovely chat after dinner and before we knew it we had talked for HOURS.  And then he drove me home (but in the American way which means we got into his car and drove to my house and not in the AUSSIE way which means something very different.)  At my house I said goodbye and went in for a kiss on the cheek again – because I’m strong like that :) and THAT was when he smooched me AGAIN! And THEN I pulled away and he stayed there.  And stayed there.  And stayed there.  And I was like, “Umm …”

Ok just kidding it was more like I went in for the cheek and didn’t feel bad at ALL when he went for the lips and then I pulled away but noticed he stayed so I went back.  hee hee.  I’m bad I know.

BUT GET THIS!  That’s it.  Yeah.  I know!

And then he asked me to come do some work for him on the side next week. Umm … ???      ????

Well alrighty then – that’s fan-flippin-tastic. We’ve gone from friends to friends who pash to friends who don’t talk to friends who smooch to business??  Wait – but that’s not what I had in the cards!!!  OOOH!  I got PLAYED!

Yes-sir-ee-bob I was played.

And I liked it. :)

Darn, darn, darn, I think I’m engaged again ;) & Things you should NOT do when hitting on me

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I shouldn’t joke about something so serious.  I’m actually quite outraged.  A kiss may be a contract for marriage but NOT WHEN THE KISS IS FORCED ON YOU!!!  Today’s blog project (I’ll explain the project another day) is to write a list.  I think that’s grand and all but I’m angry about tonight and want to vent.  SO – here is a LIST of things you should NOT do when you are trying to hit on me.

If you want to increase your odds of success when hitting on me DO NOT:

  • spill your drink on me.
  • step in front of my male friends who are talking to me because you think they are a threat.  I am not your prey you stupid pig.  [insert fake but sweet smile]
  • repeat yourself over and over and over and over and over again.
  • have wandering hands after I have REPEATEDLY TOLD YOU TO KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF YOU STUPID SWEARWORD!
  • talk to me after you’ve drank so much that you’re an idiot (giving you the VERY GRACIOUS benefit of the doubt that you MAY have not already been an idiot before the drinks.)
  • mention, suggest or use the words -fate, destiny, kismet, karma, fortune- or anything that even resembles any of those words when speaking about our recent introduction.
  • tell me you’d like to apologize for your outrageous behavior and then try to kiss me.
  • blame your unacceptable behavior on the alcohol.  I met a nice hottie last weekend who had been drinking but was still respectful.
  • continue to attempt to kiss me even though I asked you to please stop trying to kiss me.
  • grab my arms and forcefully prevent me from walking away.
  • forcefully kiss me.
  • And last but not least – don’t be a mother effin’ jack@$#!!!!

I know I lived in a little bubble back home.  And I understand that my old school traditional upbringing has left me a little naive and ill suited for the REAL world.  I probably should have seen all of the above coming tonight – but I didn’t. And yes it all happened.  And yes it made me upset.

I broke down and saw an international student counselor at school 2 weeks ago.  Things haven’t felt right for awhile and I wanted suggestions to deal with the stress.  Want to know what she said to me?  “I don’t normally advise this.  But in your case, maybe going home wouldn’t be such a bad idea.  It’s worth considering.”

I didn’t want to hear that.

So we’ll pretend she didn’t say it- at least for now.  Instead let’s focus on the fun part of my day – here are a couple pics from my first experience at the races.

races 1

Me and my FM – yay!!  He’s a blast.

races 4

races 3

This is a new friend from school – she’s an absolute doll!