Category Archives: Spiders give me the Heebie-Jeebies

Another First Day of School – and I’m a cougar??

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Today started shortly after midnight.  (yeah yeah – I know.)  But you see I had gone to bed on time!  BEFORE midnight – for once!!!  But little good that did me because I was awoken shorty after the time when I should have turned into a pumpkin.  It was my toe.  Something bit me and my toe was burning.  Probably something that looked like this!

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And NoooOoooOooo this is not a wikipedia picture – I took this one all by myself – TODAY. :) I didn’t die (yeah yeah – I know) and I finally fell back asleep, only to be woken by a buzzing.  Bzzzz.  Killer spiders and now killer moths AGAIN!  Apparently announcing my woes last night in my blog resulted in their recurrence.  (Wait – Daisy – do moths actually buzz? – I don’t know – but what else could be buzzing in my ear in the middle of the pitch black night?  Don’t answer that – I may be less scared of moths than whatever your answer is.)

Ok so I was up and at it by 6:30 this morning and you can imagine just how chipper I was after a night of almost no sleep.  Superduperchipper.  Though my mood lightened a bit when I caught the early bus which ended up being slow; HOWEVER it was filled with hotties.  Superduperhotties.  Man oh man – if only I had understood that correct train/bus time is critical for superduperhottie stalking I could have filled up my name page with like 40 more boys!!!

My first class was through this door.

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Did I mention that I’ve switched from the Uni of Syd to the Ghetto Jungle?  I just hope they have hip hop inside.  Hip hop makes everything better.  :) No seriously – it makes everything better.  Even ice cream.  And pancakes.

Ok – that was weird.  Moving on!  I liked class number 1, I also liked class number 2 and I thoroughly enjoyed these local hang outs:

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I noticed a couple interesting things on campus today.

  1. My skirt was too short – but not as short as everyone else’s dresses and shorts.
  2. I look as young or younger than many of the undergraduate students.
  3. I’m about to turn 27 and there are 19-22 year old men/boys eying me.  I think this makes me a cougar?  Hmm … I suppose I’m ok with that.  FM’s GF and I discussed (outrageously!) that maybe to celebrate my entrance into the late twenties that I should date someone from every age between 19 to 26 before 2010.   That’s quite a lofty goal – 8 men in one year – but considering I went on 7 dates with 7 different men in only 6 days back in January 2009 (yes – it’s true) – I may be able to swing it.  ;) AGH!  I’m a shocka!!!  The only difficulty with this “aspiration” is that I still have a stupid crush on CC+4 even though I know I’m being ridiculous by still having it – and since I’ve decided to look for substance I just don’t see how I can look for substance AND date hot boys based on their age.  Darn it – there goes that fab idea out the window!
  4. Spicy Salmon rolls are NOT as good as Salmon and Avocado rolls.
  5. And if I swing it correctly – lunch time could become my new networking/social endeavor.

Ok so this post is already outrageously long!  So I’ll sum up the rest of the day with a couple pics:

First Day of School Picture – I’m not sure what I’m listening to – probably one of the kick-A songs that CC+4 sent.  The “Hot Thing” one was sweet – but “Pop the Glock” was even better.  There’s also a chance I was listening to some Meiko – I love her songs “Reasons to Love you” and “Piano Song.”

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What a crappy pic eh?  Oh well – on to the next.  First semester I met Bruce -  he is a kindred spirit and a life saver!!!!  Pic from Semester 1:

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Pic from semester 2: Bruce says I look younger … but I’m pretty sure my name isn’t Benjamin Button.

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It was amazing to catch up with Bruce – he is like a wise fortune teller.  Except he doesn’t predict the future.    He just has an uncanny knack for really understanding the HERE and NOW.

Next I saw the following sign – wteff?  and I learned another latin dance.

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So there you have it.  A VERY long day.  Very very long.  I didn’t get home until midnight and feel like I haven’t slept for days.  I am SOOOOOO crashing tomorrow – and maybe doing some reading on the beach.  Which btw – I have some great points to make on the book “How To Win Friends and Influence People” – so maybe I’ll get to that this week.  Oh and I haven’t forgotten – I need to post my cricket video!  YAY!!!

Does anyone else salsa dance?  How long did it take you to learn?  I seriously suck.

There IS a Bathroom Demon – and he’s out to get me

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There comes a time in our lives when we have to confront our demons.  My time is now.  Ordinarily I would do tons and tons of research – wait – scratch that – normally I would procrastinate doing the research until FINALLY I decided I couldn’t procrastinate any longer and then I would do enough research to make sure that the decision or action would also need to be procrastinated … but unfortunately I don’t have time to read all of the latest self-help books this time and I’m fairly certain that a 12-step program is out of the question.

Here’s the timeline of trouble:

  • It started with an ocean adventure last May. I got sea sick, went below deck to vomit and discovered a toilet full to the brim of you don’t even want to know what.  Gag me!  Oh wait – I was about to throw up anyway!  My friend graciously handed me a bucket – yes a bucket – so that I could throw up in that – so exciting.  But that’s not the best part!!!  We hit a pretty big swell and I was THROWN to the side of the bathroom – did you remember the toilet was full?
  • Not a month later I found myself LOCKED in a public bathroom stall in a deserted bathroom.  I literally POLICE KICKED THE DOOR to no avail. I was trapped.  Trapped in a PUBLIC, DESERTED BATHROOM STALL.
  • Next there was the moth.  The horrible HUGE BLACK KILLER MOTH.   I was terrified to use the bathroom at work for days.  And then when I snuck to another floor to use their bathroom I found myself in a men’s bathroom.  AGH!
  • And let’s not forget the time I discovered a black spider crawling up my bare thigh in my bathroom, or the time I was about to get in the shower (translation: I wasn’t wearing any clothes) and had to stand on top of the toilet to kill a poisonous spider, but slipped, fell and dropped the last and only roll of toilet paper (my weapon of choice) into the running shower.
  • In addition, it would be remiss of me to leave out the time when I was “stuck with my pants down tinkling on the toilet when a cockroach so large it should really be displayed in a museum came within inches of my toes.”  Oh yes.
  • So it’s time to confront the demon.  The bathroom demon.  About 2 weeks ago I walked out of a public bathroom and someone stopped me to tell me I had toilet paper stuck to my stiletto. HAHAHAHAHAHA! This is terrible right?  It gets worse – much worse.
  • Yesterday there was a lizard in my bathroom.  THERE WAS A LIZARD IN MY BATHROOM!!!! I’ll admit it was small – but that kind of made it worse!!!  Especially because it didn’t look like a normal lizard.  This lizard was JET BLACK and SLIMY.  It looked like a worm with legs.  I hate worms.  And my clairvoyance told me it wanted to burrow under my skin.

So – Mr. Bathroom Demon (who my flatmate says is named Helga … say what?) ok so Ms. Bathroom Demon – I admit you exist.  And now that I’ve acknowledged my demon I’m pretty sure fireworks are supposed to fly from the sky and whisk my demon away.

Hmm …

Nothing’s happened yet. Self-help section here I come!

Worms and Dirt are soooo gross

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a-goof-4Oh my, my, my.  What a week this has been!!  My last day of class was today (hip hip hooray!) and as I’m sure you know – studying for finals is HECTIC!!

I ended up enjoying the class – who knew Counter-terrorism and Human Rights would prove to be fascinating? There is so much to consider with regard to the delicate balance between security and liberty.  A nation must be secure in order to provide liberty but protecting certain liberties can endanger security! A bit of a catch-22.

a-goof-2We fared ok on our sucky group presentation but we didn’t get an A.  :( 5 years ago I would have cried because I didn’t get an A – but I’ve decided that because this was out of my control (stupid group work!) I don’t need to fuss myself about it.  We got a B.

After class I headed out with the FM’s GF and I’ll tell you what – I love that girl!  She’s CRAZY!  lol.  She calls me a “shocka” all of the time – but I think maybe she’s projecting.  ;) HAHA!  Ok – maybe we’re BOTH “shocka”s.  She’s on the far left in the pic below.  Her hottie sis is in the background and the cutie next to me?  That’s Ben.  He reckons I should go camping while I’m in  Australia.

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I think camping is a great idea and all but I have this phobia of worms.  Oh yes.  Worms.  I’m terrified of them.  I can’t look at them, the thought of touching them makes my skin absolutely crawl and they live in dirt.  And I don’t like dirt.  But there is a lot of dirt when you camp. Or at least I think there is a lot of dirt when you camp.  There is in Utah!  a-goof-9

Wait a minute – Daisy – you’re afraid of worms? but you have an eyeball in your mocktail? Yep.  That’s right.

Haha!  doesn’t that drink look absolutely foul?  The nasty egg looking thing is a lychee and the black floaty things are passionfruit seeds.  SOOOO delicious.  It just looks like eyeballs and guts.  :) I think it’s my new favorite non-alcoholic beverage.  Tart, yummy, fruity and the carbonation in the Sprite makes your tongue tingle.

a-goof-6Ok back to like one of the worst subjects on the planet – dirt  and worms.  One time I ate a Harry Potter Jelly Belly that was flavored ‘earthworm.’  Disgusting.  I about gagged and then even after I spit it out I STILL almost threw up.  So gross.  And traumatic.

Why did I do it?  Because the guy I was sharing the Bertie Botts with said he’d eat the vomit one if I ate the earthworm one.  Yeah – he got the better end of the deal.  I’ll be haunted by that flavor FOREVER!

Anyway – I think I’ll try to go camping.  I mean – sure – Australia grows deadly gross stuff (ex: snakes or spiders) and that means they probably most likely have killer worms…   But Ben goes camping all of the time and I don’t think he’d tell me to go if he thought I’d be attacked by killer worms.  But you never know – I could be wrong.  I hear killer worms like to eat redheads in particular – and Ben did offer to accompany me … maybe he wants to FEED me to them.  ;)

A new superhero power

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I should really start keeping track of how many cool super hero powers I have. I figured out another one the other day. And then of course – let us not forget that I have SUPERHUMAN PERIPHERAL SPIDER RADAR VISION which is about the coolest thing evah (spelled “ever” in the U.S.) (read about it HERE – oh lol. And no I’m NOT graceful.)

Anyway – today I am happy to announce that I have discovered I have Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah (Power). Are you impressed?  Because you should be.  You see, as I mentioned in the linked post above, superhero powers that are a mouthful to say are better than those that are not.  And that means Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah is awesome by the title ALONE.  HOWEVER that’s not the ONLY reason why this power is so flipping sweet. No no, this power rocks because it gives me the ability to hide/store stuff – like cool superhero stuff – like lipgloss.  )

Want to know how I discovered this cool power?  I found a “new” pocket on one of my skirts today and then – the VERY SAME DAY (which is still today) – I discovered that the “decorative” pocket on my super fly new hat is actually functional! Decorative AND useful. How cool is that?

So anyway – that’s my BIG news for today. Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah.  I can’t really top that.  It’s just too cool.  Oh wait – omgosh – I ALMOST forgot!  I can’t TOP that but I do have other important news.  I’ve fallen in love with lychees.  Have you ever had a lychee? (spelled “litchi” in the U.S.) YUM. I LUV them.

Ok – better start my homework. I’m the only one in my group who does the reading so I have to do 3x as much. Have a happy Friday! And please feel sorry for me ;) as it’s going to be a scor-cha tomorrow (spelled “omgosh it’s so hot I think I’m going to die” in the U.S.) with temps close to like 1,000,000 Celsius and at least 134% humidity.  That’s hot.  So hot I won’t be able to wear my super fly new hat.  ( But hey – at least I’m a superhero. Do YOU have any cool superhero pow-ahs?

I’m in the U.S.

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Have you ever noticed that U.S. Public Libraries are treasure chests full of the worst movies ever? I’m back home in the U.S. now – came home 2 weeks earlier than expected for a little Merry Christmas surprise for my parents.  They had NO idea!  ) YAY!  How fun!!

Before I left I got permission to turn in one of my final essays a couple of days late (because I would be traveling) and so I needed to head over to the public library today for some research.  And let me tell you I am SO glad I did.  Our public library has a whole section of DVDs that never should have been made.  And RIGHT NOW ScottPete and I are watching a Halloween Town trilogy marathon.  HAHAHAHA!

Oh how I’ve missed home!  Where else could I watch really sucky Halloween movies 2 weeks AFTER Halloween?  ) But I have to say – I miss my other home too.  Yes, I typed that correctly.  Bondi finally feels like home. ) And though it’s great to see my family again – I will be excited to return to Australia!!

Australia has some bad points – but maybe no more than Utah.

So … Cheers!  I’ll miss you Australia and can’t wait to get back.  Xx ~Daisy

Sick Omgosh – gag me now!  Was that some sappy crap or what?  Thank goodness it’s over!!!  Sick But for realzzz – it will be good to get back to Bondi.  )

I’m happy I Accepted the “You are in trouble” pamphlet

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Well, well, well … if I didn’t benefit from a little Karma with a capital K yesterday then my blogging name isn’t Daisy.  Why?  I’ll tell you.  Yesterday I decided to accept the “You are DOOMED” pamphlet that my arguably evil fairy godmother offered and it saved me from a terrible, horrible, ever-so-painful death from the bite of a big ugly spider. Nodding 3 yep. yep.

It was mid-morning and I was on my way to school.  The sun had just risen to that perfect point in the sky where everything is covered in a beautiful golden haze.  It’s the time of day when you can almost believe fairytales DO happen (except in this specific instant the whole thing felt more like the BAD part of a fairytale.)

So there I was, happily trotting along my merry way.  The sun was peaking through the trees above me and dancing in happy patterns along the sidewalk.  I was like “la-dee-da” and very content.  (but not smiling of course because I don’t smile. )   Not Amused Oh seriously how much do I love emoticons?  TONS!!!

And then before I knew it there was an old woman in front of me.  But not just any old woman.  This one was stylish.  Her hair was perfection, her clothes were up-to-date and a litte TOO fresh, and then her make-up was immaculate … hmm … if it weren’t for her sickeningly sweet smile I may have been tempted to eat an apple from her!

“May I give you these to read?” she asked.

“Huh?”  I took out my earphones and looked at her very suspiciously.

“May I give you these to read?” she repeated.

She locked eyes with me and I heard myself saying “Sure.”  I mean … ok yeah – she probably used her secret, super psychic mind powers to force me into taking the “You are doomed and about to die” pamphlet – but it couldn’t really hurt could it?

I walked away from her and she disappeared.  Disappeared into thin air.  It was more than a little disconcerting.  But I suppose it’s what I get.  I COULD have turned around and LOOKED to see if she really disappeared – but I’m more of a “Choose your own adventure” type of gal and my choices were

Turn around and see if the woman is still there – go to page 45
Walk away without turning around – go to page 263

What can I say?  I picked page 263 and I’m glad I did because on page 263 it said this:

Live forever and be tormented by the fact that you don’t REALLY know if the woman evaporated. The End

But it’s not the end

because last night there was a HUMONGOUS spider in my room and guess what?  I rolled up the pamphlet and whacked the spider with it.  YAY!

There was a spider in my bed…

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Omgosh, Omgosh, Omgosh.

There was a spider in my bed.

I just killed it. And that required that I touch it because there was no time for me to find something to kill it with …

I’m absolutely traumatized.

Last night the NEW New Guy That I Haven’t Told You About Yet saw the look of terror in my eyes when I realized this house has vents in every room that lead straight outside. Apparently the houses were designed so the ocean breeze could flow straight through the house. They do this on purpose and my discovery made me shudder.

I looked at the NEW New guy and asked “Is there at least mesh somewhere in those vents to prevent spiders?” He looked back at me knowingly, “Is mesh what would prevent spiders from coming in sweetheart?” I said “Yes” and he very kindly lied to me, assuring me that they all have mesh. He did it to make me feel better … but now that I saw a SPIDER ON MY BED I don’t feel so well…

I have the internet again – YAY!!!

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RIGHT NOW – I’m sitting on the futon that is supposed to be my bed, in a closet that is supposed to be my room. I should be able to move into my REAL room with a REAL bed in the next month. But not yet.

I tried to kill the same spider 6 times today – I’m pretty sure I was successful on the 6th try. I killed one yesterday too. I think my superhuman peripheral spider radar vision is stronger than ever. My spider paranoia is also stronger than ever.

It’s pretty flippin amazing how out of shape I became in only 9 days. I exercised this morning and was huffing enough to audition for the Big Bad Wolf. All I did was WALK.

BIG NEWS!!! I took the bus for the first time in my life today. And then I took the train. And THEN I walked a mile from the train station to class. I wore my backpack. My backpack suffocates my back. It was pretty darn sexy when I finally got to class and took my backpack off. The back of my shirt was drenched in sweat.

gross.

And while I’m sharing embarrassing things… I’m listening to Jesse McCartney right now. On REPEAT.

Spiders give me the heebie-jeebies

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I have a 6th sense for spiders. In fact, I have superhuman peripheral spider radar vision. Yeah – it’s true. And try to say THAT ten times fast. No not “that” ten times – try to say superhuman peripheral spider radar vision ten times fast. Oh yeah – it’s not easy to say.

Which is why this gift is such a burden. Superhuman powers that are a mouthful to say are more special than the ones that aren’t. Let’s just agree that I’m right.

It’s like the time in the middle of the night that I crawled out of bed to go to the bathroom and caught by the reflection of moonlight the spider crawling up my bare thigh. If I wasn’t cursed with this amazing gift I wouldn’t have had to SCREAM, freak-out, and in a spasm to get that blasted thing OFF of me I wouldn’t have bruised my hip on the bathroom counter.

Or today when I noticed on the ceiling above my shower a little BIG HUGE spider that was most assuredly harmless a deadly one that was more scared of me than I was of it wanted to not only BITE me but to burrow under my skin causing a slow and painful death… if I didn’t have this gift I wouldn’t have had to try and balance precariously on the toilet and use a roll of toilet paper to try and kill it. And then when it didn’t die and started crawling along the toilet paper roll toward my SKIN I wouldn’t have dropped the last roll of toilet paper into the running shower, screamed, fallen off the toilet and then panicked to try and find out where the spider landed.

Oh the joys of superhuman powers. And p.s. heebie-jeebies is a word. I attached the definition.